Grocery shopping is a chore. And I hate chores. Always have, always will. But grocery shopping for my gang is not just a chore, it's hard labor. Even when I'm just making the list. Because all week long I think, I need this, I need that, and run to hurry and scribble it down. Only to discover my 14 yr. old has taken it off the fridge, because she's obsessed with having bare doors. She also can't sleep at night if all the cabinet doors aren't closed all the way. Which actually turns into a pretty fun game if you're real bored. Cruel, but fun.
Anyway, so grocery day gets here. I have no list. Now, I have to scour the fridge & pantry trying to see what I need & maybe remember what I wrote down. 99.7% of the time, I can't remember it at all. I just kinda stand in front of the pantry, dumbfounded, trying to remember what I was even doing in the first place.
Then I spend a good hour planning my meals. I have to do this, or HEB will be a regular part of my day. Heck, I don't have enough time to make a potty break a regular part of my day! Okay, planned the meals. Now, I have to write down all the ingredients needed. That means, I have to once again stand like an idiot in front of the pantry. I'm scanning the shelves, looking for an ingredrient, then back at the paper again, then back at the pantry cause I done forgot what I was looking for. Meantime, kids see me standing by the pantry and think it's an open invitation for me to get down whatever they want. Which is so annoying. They just stand at my ankles yapping like little chihuahuas. Now that I have my list all complete, now I get to search through coupons. Oh yeah baby, I use me some coupons. But, I am not that person in the front of the line with 10 salespapers. You know, the ones trying to compare, and get better prices without having to actually drive to that store in the first place. Nope, I just use my handy lil coupons.
Okay, so... meals? Check. List? Check. Coupons? Check. Now, I'm ret to go. And then Keldron informs me he wants fish for dinner on Tuesday. Screeeech, hit the brakes. Hold up, wait a minute. What? Babe, did or did you not, just pick on me, and laugh at me for having such a hard time getting all this together? Now you wanna mess up my flow? Now I gotta start all over for just one meal. Re-make the list, re-check the pantry, look through more coupons. Fish can't wait til next week? "Ha, ha, gotcha!", he says. After THE most ghetto eyeroll I could muster, I'm off. Then I kinda giggle to myself. Was he really playing a joke on me, or did he fear me. Cause I went off for a minute there.
First stop is walmart. Gotta get pull-ups, diapers, wipes, TP, and other stuff that would be sky high at the other stores. But today, today is different. Because today, I brought the kids. Why? Oh, because daddy didn't get to sleep well last night. Ha! I haven't slept in 2 1/2 years!! So, walmart was and always is a complete disaster. People with bad kids were looking at me like, "can you please control your heathens?" They are usually good at the store. If it's just me and them. But today, Celeste went. Which hurt more than help. Cause they don't fear Celeste. Nope, she says stop and they go. Anyway, after the walmart trip, guess what? Keldron had to wake up. There was no way in hell I was gonna drag them with me to another store. Matter of fact, Celeste had to get out of the truck too. I didn't need anyone to slow me down. After I unloaded everyone, it was all gravy baby. I hit up my next two spots and came home. Now, I just have one last question for ya........................................
Who's gonna help me put all this junk up?
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